Someone once said that if you were interested in finding the cause of all your mistakes and failures – look in a mirror. And while at first, that expression might easily be dismissed as just trivial nonsense, at second glance it really has some merit.
What it is saying is that since it was your concepts, thinking, understanding, emotional pre-programming, memory, courage or fear, etc., that went into any action, all mistakes and failures that you experience have a lot to do with the person looking back at you in that mirror.
And, it doesn’t mean that you are bad or dumb or not wanting to succeed – it just means that either you just didn’t know enough, did not have the right information or thought that the actions steps you took in and of themselves were enough.
It really doesn’t matter! What matters is not how you ACT – only how you RE-ACT to any mistake, error, failure or setback that comes your way. What matters is that you FACE UP, learn from what isn’t or didn’t go right, face up to the failure without using self-defeating emotion, affirmation or behavior and instead carefully examine the whole issue and make a list of the lessons learned and the distinctions made in the process.
Facing up, means discovering the internal truth about who you are, and then ameliorating those thoughts or actions with new foresight, courage and action. And, I caution you, that “trying” to succeed by doing the same old thing, by repeating the thoughts, plans or actions of something that failed, WILL NEVER bring about desired results – NEVER.
Worse yet, is recognizing the weakness and believing that just because you have discovered the problem, it will go away by you talking about it or telling yourself what you “HAVE TO DO.”
For instance, who says, “I have to quit smoking.” Smokers say that. Who says, “I just have to get more new patients.” Doctors who have a low number of new patients say that. And, who says, by verbal acknowledgement or non-verbal feelings, thoughts and/or emotions, “I am not confrontational enough” or “I am afraid” or “If I do this or that they (the patients) will either leave or not like me. People who are non-confrontational and those who are in fear of a negative consequence, of course.
So, knowing who you are and even attempting to take more actions will not necessarily bring about better results. Nor will pounding away with by doing daily affirmations or by getting half-time locker-room pep-talks, from a well meaning coach. “You can do it, go for it, give it all you’ve got” or “Have courage, be determined, focus in, energize and keep your eye on the ball.
All good stuff, but simply not enough, because the root cause of the failures or mistakes have not been handled.
In order to change the results you are getting, YOU MUST FIRST CHANGE YOUR BELIEF SYSTEM. You see, it is a fact – not just another seminar saying, that, “Your Beliefs Create Your Reality.”
So, if internally you fear rejection you will automatically be less confrontational with a patient and the words you select or the actions you take will be laced with the seeds of failure, because you will lack certainty, authority and authenticity.
If you believe that patients will stop coming in when their pain goes away or the insurance goes away, and you present them with a wellness visitation plan that is essentially incongruent with your beliefs, you will never get the results you want.
So the key is FACING UP to the fact that if your beliefs create your reality, all you have to do to change the results you get – is to purposely and deliberately CHANGE YOUR MIND and alter your belief system.
And, amazingly enough this does not take days, weeks or years. Actually, it only takes a few minutes. You can decide to have courage instead of fear. You can decide to tell patients or customers what they truly need and not what you think they will accept.
You can decide that building a bigger or better business is now a priority to you and you can let go of the rationalizations, excuses and defense mechanisms you have used over and over again, but to no avail.
Instead of saying, “I want to or I need to get more new business” and fool yourself into thinking that direct mailings or passive advertising will do – what do you think would happen if you changed your belief system to include the fact that people in general are just interested in what you have to say.
I’ll bet it would dramatically have a positive effect on the results you get. Face Up – change your beliefs and your new beliefs will change the emotions and actions you put out – and what goes around, does come around.